What the past 10 years of marriage has taught me
This past June, my husband and I celebrated 10 years of marriage.
It honestly doesn’t even seem like it's been that long, but here we are 10 years later.
Marriage is wonderful, but it can be hard at times. You married your best friend and life is grand, but being honest even your best friend can get on your last nerve sometimes.
Alright alright, in all fairness I’m sure that I’ve gotten on my husbands nerve a time or two.
Seriously though… marriage is great and these last 10 years have been a wonderful adventure, full of good times and great lessons.
Here’s what the past 10 years of marriage has taught me
Laughter goes a long way
There can be some really hard times in life, which can create hard times in marriage, but laughter can go a long way. Keeping a good sense of humor can make the rough patches a little easier.
Communication & Trust is key
These two are essential in a marriage. You MUST be able to communicate with your spouse and you MUST trust each other. When there is lack in communication there will automatically start to become a lack of trust. I get it…guys aren’t really the best at communicating but they are capable of it and if the relationship means a lot to them, they will make an effort to get better at it….. And ladies, We can’t assume that they know everything we are thinking, without telling them. They aren’t mind readers! Without communication and trust, you might as well start prepping for constant arguing…. so you may want to invest in a study & comfortable couch.
It’s not about you
That’s right, It’s not about you. Once you are married you are a team, but I’ll go ahead and tell you right now that if you both make an effort to put the other one first, things are much better. It’s not all about what you want, you must think about your spouse first. Selflessness is not easy but there is no better way to show your spouse that you love them.
Grow together
My husband and I got married pretty young… A lot of people advise against that but for us, it worked. No matter what age you get married I hear a lot of people say that they “just grew apart from each other.” Honestly I think when this happens it’s more of the issue listed above (it’s not about you). I actually find it pretty lovely when you can grow together. Yes there will be rough times and you won’t always seem on the same page, but make the choice to grow together, hand in hand.
The little things add up
If you are about to get married and you are daydreaming about all the “big” moments in life, all the trips, buying a house, having kids….you might be highly disappointed. Life isn’t full of the “big” moments…it’s full of the wonderful little moments and the little things. Remember to do the little things that your spouse loves, trust me, the little things add up. Pick up their favorite treat on the way home, reach over and hold their hand, continue to open the door for them, remember to tell them that you appreciate everything they do. The little things truly do matter.
Marriage is great, but it's also hard work. But then again, everything worth having and holding onto, is worth working for.